Where is the energy gone?

Today I completed my senior management training program of Engineers India Limited. It was a good program and the program was held at Surajkund, Haryana. I was surprised by the huge size of the property in Surajkund. Its so close to Delhi and such a nice property but I could not find out many people in the hotel. Their is a good swimming pool at the center. First day I had sometime to spend around the swimming pool. I thought I could speak to myself. But lo there were few week end couples and I got a new profession. They asked me to take photographs and once I started the process, then found that every couple ran to me. They were so engrossed in their life and talk that they could not guess that they are perturbing to someone else life.
I had to handle a bundle of difficult managers who were predominantly engineers and had no idea of management and were thinking that I was talking out of the box. Interestingly, when I started heating them and liking thier bad performance then there was pin drop silence. I hardly do such kind of stuff with trainees, but this time I had to. I remember I had done this with IPS officers while training them.
Why I am writing this stuff on my personal blog. Actually I wanted to write that I am getting tired these days faster than before.Earlier I could manage a five day training program alone, but now it seems difficult. I dont why is this happenning? Is this because I am getting older and over working myself. It may be there is something unknown happenning to me and I will only know about this at the last stage of life.

I got few interesting phone calls in last few days. Out of these calls, there was a call from Manaswini from London. She is travelling back home and called me from there. Though professionally she is doing fine, she was worried about her career and she was woriied about what she has not got in life than what she has already obtained on life. I dont know what to councel her because my philosophy of life is different than hers.

The Ghost Catchers

I took a break. I dont know wheather my visitors and fellow bloggers waited for me to come back and see me writing again, but I took a break and went to my home town... you know where... nayagarh.... Infact I had started writing about Nayagrah and my childhood days and in between this officiating director stuff happenned and it derailed my thoughts. Yes, I went to my home town. Did I write about this small, sleepish and below the mountain squezzed kinda town where gossips travel faster than bullets and everybody looks at the other guy in a different way.
So i reached this town and met babu rao, one of my school mates after a really long long time. This is because when I met him last, he was not married and when I met him this time, he had two kids. I took my son to the hostel where I stayed and once dared to follow a ghost. may be I was traying to catch a ghost on that night. I had heard that there was a young ghost in the nearby forest and she often comes in full moon nights to visit the vicinity of the hostel. I was told that she also settles down near the water tank and enjoys the moonlighting ! I also enjoy moonlighting and was going for long drives on full moon nights. These dats I dont do that as I dont remember when full moon night happens. Sir and madam, I have become a donkey these years.... academic donkey and only work like a donkey. So all these finer aspects of life are gone. May be by writing this blog I am trying to pull out some of these finer points of my life which made me very popular, at least among my women fans. I took my son to show him the water tank where I saw the ghost.

I remember Jeetu, Asit Satpathy and myself were busy in young age chatting when we saw the shadow of the yound lady near the water tank. Jeetu motivated us to go closer to her. So we started to catch a ghost ! We were so stupid on those days. I was the one on the front and when I came out to the main road of the hostel, Jeetu was already gone....! If at some point of time, Jeetu's son/daughter will read this blog, they will realize how cowradice their father was! Then after some distance, Asit also stepped back and suddenly I found myself alone ina kuchha road inside a forest and fifty meters up front, the lady was still there near the water tank. I dont know how one feels when someone puts an ice cube in someone else's under garment but on that night it was really chilling!!, I ran back at a speed probably I would have won the hundred meter sprint of my college. This time I took my son there but the tank was not there. Even the density of the forest was also less and there were more buildings around. I am sure the beautiful ghost must have found out a new destination in between.
But it was a real pleasure to go back to the home town, I didnt take up the calls and didnt check emails during those days. I only stayed with my parents and grand parents and worked like a construction worker and tried to finish the first floor of my house. I visited to the market sometime in between but was searching for someone within. I was searching for a classmate of mine called Sukanti who was in chemistry honours. Though her name was Sukanti(beautiful), but there can not be any correlation between how she looks and her name. Our parents are always optimistic about ourselves. Other than the appearance part of it, she was an extremely good student and was a brilliant person in organic chemistry. In our second year of the course she introduced me to her boyfriend. A frill, dull looking boy but she told me that the boy was very supportive and always motivates her. Do boys do that ever? I dont know when I was a boy whether i have done someting similar or not, may be my friends will tell that. Seema will be able to tell that because she was the closes girl to me during my post graduation days and may be at some part of life. what I didnt like about her on those days was her short tempered behavior and tendency to withdraw after a fight. She will get angry very fast and will take up a fight, but after some time, she will withdraw herself so much that you feel like doing a crime by fighting with her! When she fought with me, I thought she was arrogant and when she withdrew, I always felt like being a sinner. Thats why I had a love and hate relationship with her at that point of time.
Manaswini is in Denmark and she read my blog and called up to say that she could read in between lines. I guess she was talking about Seema, but latter on realized that she was talking about my emotional side and not about her. What to think about her. Its awkward to beleive that I have not met her for fifteen years now (fifteen years is too long a time in life, its twenty five percent of life)and I dont know whether I will ever be able to meet her before I die. If somebody is reading my blog and could establish some contact with her, please tell her that I would like to meet her and say sorry for all the fights, confusions and sufferrings before I die, otherwise the waiting will be longer..... Let me stop here now as I run the risk of going overboard on the personal relationships.